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[personal profile] holmesticemods posting in [community profile] holmestice
Title: Forever and Always
Recipient: [personal profile] seaweed_writes
Author: redpenrevolution
Verse: BBC Sherlock
Characters/Pairings: Sherlock Holmes/John Watson
Rating: T
Warnings: None
Summary: He clears his throat, clogged with sentiment as it is. He knows that this is the most he'll ever get with Sherlock. Sherlock doesn't do relationships. Oh, sure he loves and can be so soft, but it's not a romantic sort of love. It's just platonic or familial.

He doesn't love John that way.

Read on AO3: Forever and Always



When John comes home, he comes in through the kitchen and sets down the groceries and takeout and turns into the living room to the heartwarming sight of Sherlock and Rosie watching a movie snuggled up under a blanket and half empty mugs of hot chocolate.

The flat is warm and cozy and all decked out in fairy lights from the Christmas Tree to the mantle and windows. The tree has been decorated, though it's lacking a star.

Rosie jumps up from under the blanket and rushs John to give him a hug.

"Daddy!"

"Hey there love bug," John says as he leans down to pick up his little girl. She's four going on five and starting to get a bit big for him to pick up. "You have a good day with Sherlock?"

"Mhmm. We put up fairy lights and ornaments on the tree and we saved the star for you. You have to put the star on the tree."

"Oh yeah? Well I shall after dinner then. Thank you." John smiles at Rosie and then looks over to Sherlock who's still under the blanket on the couch. Sherlock gives John a small smile. John goes to return the smile, but is suddenly caught off guard by a small hand pushing his face back towards Rosie.

"Daddy pay attention. I'm not done. We also watched a movie. It has-it has pretty music and there were butterflies and the daddy butterfly protected the baby butterfly and there was also Mickey Mouse and he couldnt stop the brooms. He was a-uh-um..."

Sherlock gets up then carrying the cocoa mugs and comes over and stage whispers to Rosie, "Wizard," then wanders into the kitchen.

Rosie continues like she had the word all along. "He was a wizard. He didn't listen and he got in trouble. Ok. I'm done. You can put me down now daddy."

John smiles at Rosie with one of his big open mouth smiles. "Oh I can, can I? What if I don't want too? What if I want to keep you in my arms forever and ever? Hm what then?" John lifts Rosie high in the air and then brings her down, gives her a big hug and lots a kisses on her face.

Rosie shrieks with laughter, "No, daddy, stop! You have to put me down! I have to get Elsa ready for dinner!"

John sets Rosie down on the ground. "Ah well I suppose you're right then. If you have to get Princess Elsa ready for dinner." He gives her one more kiss on her forehead.

Rosie gives John a kiss on his cheek, "Thank you. Love you daddy." She then runs off upstairs to fetch her doll.

John walks into the kitchen. Sherlock is putting the groceries away.

"I take it you two watched Fantasia today?"

Sherlock continues to put away the groceries. "Yes. We were in the middle of our second watch as a matter of fact. She liked the Mickey one a lot as well as the whales. The butterfly one and the forest nymph one scared her a bit I think, but she didn't complain."

"Okay. Who's idea was it for me to put the star on the tree?"

Sherlock turns around, now done with the groceries. "Her. I tried to tell her her daddy wouldn't mind if she did it, but she insisted. You have to put on the tree. Didn't know how to tell her you can't reach the tip." Sherlock says the last bit with a lightly teasing tone.

"Oi. That's why they invented chairs."

"Pretty sure chairs are for sitting."

There's something about their light banter that makes John's heart squeeze and his stomach flip. He feels like he's flirting. Suddenly he can feel his face flush.

Sherlock's brow furrows and he tilts his head to the side slightly, assessing John. "You okay?"

John shakes his head, "Yeah, I'm fine. Just suddenly realized how warm it is in here." He walks around the table and opens the kitchen window a crack. An ice cold breeze drifts in.

John takes in a deep breath and feels himself calm back down. He turns back towards Sherlock and catches him quickly looking away.

Before John can say anything, ask anything, Rosie comes thundering down the stairs and into the kitchen. "Daddy! Sherlock! Elsa and I are ready for dinner." Rosie has put her Elsa dress on over her regular clothes and made sure Elsa was wearing her blue dress as well.

Oblivious to any tension between the adults, Rosie climbs onto a dining chair and looks expectantly at John.

"Ah! Fantastic. It seems Princess Elsa and Princess Rosie have decided to grace us with their prescence this evening." John smiles down at his daughter and then up at Sherlock.

Sherlock is smiling down at Rosie, a wholly tender look that John realizes is frequently on his face these days.

John feels his face go soft and he's sure that if Sherlock looked to him in this moment he would see nothing but love on his face.

He clears his throat, clogged with sentiment as it is. He knows that this is the most he'll ever get with Sherlock. Sherlock doesnt do relationships. Oh, sure he loves and can be so soft, but it's not a romantic sort of love. It's just platonic or familial.

He doesn't love John that way.

"I'll get the plates then. Sherlock could you pull the takeaway out of the bags?"

"Of course John."

Rosie picks up on Sherlock's tone and gives a shout, "Obviously, daddy" Its very different them when Sherlock says it; for starters, Rosie hasn't got the sarcasm tone right yet so it sounds overly joyful, but she has decided that part of the amusement is in how deep Sherlock's voice usually is when he says it and she does her best to imitate that. Its become a game, a tradition now. When someone says 'obviously', everyone else has to too.

John turns around with the plates and says in a deep voice, "Obviously, Princess Rosie," and then looks with Rosie to Sherlock, who smiles and says in his deepest voice, "Obviously."

Ritual complete, Rosie giggles with joy and Sherlock and John sit down. Sherlock next to Rosie and John across the table. They plate the food and tuck in.

It's quiet a moment as they all start their meals.

John contemplates Sherlock and Rosie in front of him. Four years ago he never would have imagined any of this. Sherlock and him raising Rosie right by themselves. In his wildest fantasized he never thought he could have something like this. Truly the only thing missing for John was the freedom to love Sherlock as wholly as he wanted to. To convey through touch how much he loved the man seated across from him.

He wanted to touch him with his hands, with his lips. Bring him to the peaks of pleasure over and over again. He wanted to show him for the rest of their days on this earth how much he loved him.

Rosie begins chatting about the food and the movies. John answers appropriately where necessary. He's distracted though and can tell Sherlock knows he's distracted.

Rosie finishes her bit of food and asks to be excused from the table. John grants permission, but she has the stay in the living room until he and Sherlock are done eating.

Sherlock observes John quietly while John continues to peck at his food. John jumps when Sherlock covers John's socked foot with his own under the table. They don't pull apart though.

"Are you okay?"

John's eyebrows go up a tick. Sherlock usually just decides through whatever deductions that John isn't okay. He rarely ever actually asks. John wonders what Sherlock expects him to say.

"Yeah. Of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

Sherlock gives him a wary look, "You've been off and on giving me forlorn looks whenever I'm with Rosie. I'm not sure you realize you're doing it."

"Ah, no, I hadn't realized." John can feel his face flush with embarrassment.

"Am I doing something wrong John?"

John feels like his heart could break at the utter uncertainty in Sherlock's statement, that he could even think that he's somehow failing Rosie crushes John. Sherlock is perfect with Rosie and he says as much.

Sherlock nods in understanding. "Then what is it?"

"It's just me. Don't worry about it. Probably just the short days getting to me." John knows the reassuring smile he gives is anything but reassuring.

"Daddy! Are you done eating? We have to put the star on the tree." Rosie calls impatiently from the living room.

"Just a minute sweetheart, we're finishing now."

Sherlock and John clean up their places and wrap up the leftovers, then head into the living room.

Rosie is holding the star for the tree waiting for John. "You have to put the star on the tree daddy and make a wish."

John picks his little princess up. "Oh is that so? Well why don't we all put it put together at the same time and then we can all get a wish. Can we do that?"

Rosie smiles clutching the star and nods her head once decisively.

Sherlock steps over to join in the placing of the star on their Christmas tree. He leans in close and places an arm behind Rosie resting on John's back.

Together they reach up to place the star and gently it's passed from Rosie's small hands to John's to Sherlock's to the tip of the tree where it rests crookedly.

Rosie gasps out loud. "It's bootiful daddy."

"Yes it is love bug." He gives Rosie a kiss on her head and so does Sherlock.

Irrationally John wishes Sherlock could be free to show him affection like that as well. He'll have to settle for Sherlock's warm hand on his back.

Rosoe looks between John and Sherlock, "Did you make wishes?"

Sherlock answers, "Of course. Did you?"

"Yes! I wished for snow!"

"Snow! How exciting. Well when it snows we'll have to build a snowman, how about that?"

Rosie throws her hands up and nearly hits John in the face, "Yeah!"

John puts Rosie down, but instead of running off she tugs on Sherlock's pant leg. "What did you wish for?"

"Me?" Sherlock says crouching down. "Well I wished that you'll be my friend forever and always."

"That's a silly wish."

"Hey!" John chastises gently, "There's no such thing as a silly wish. Why would you say something like that?"

"Because I'll always be Papa Sherlock's friend just like you daddy."

Both Sherlock and John turn beet red. Sherlock because that's the first time Rosie has ever referred to him as Papa and John because that's how he's been secretly referring to Sherlock for ages.

"Ok. I'm going potty now."

Rosie trots off to the restroom while John and Sherlock stand up and both begin to speak at the same time.

"I-she's never-I wouldn't-"

"Don't know how she-"

They both stop.

"You first," says Sherlock.

"No, please you first."

Sherlock gives a weak smile, "I'm sorry John. I would never encourage Rosie to refer to me as Papa and please be assured I will discourage it from here on out."

John gives Sherlock a perplexed look.

"Why would you discourage it?"

Sherlock looks taken aback.

"I'm not her father. We wouldnt want her confused. I'm just...helping out. Until you find a new wife."

Now it's John's turn to be taken aback.

"A new wife? Sherlock, I- Sit down." John takes a seat in his chair and Sherlock takes a seat in his. They've been pushed much closer together to make room for the Christmas Tree.

"Sherlock. I'm not going to be getting a new wife, ever."

"But, you-"

"Let me finish."

"I have everything I want with you. My daughter has two fathers as far as I'm concerned. I don't want to change our life for anything. I'm happy."

"You're happy? With me?"

John could kick his past self 1000 times over because he knows that he's the one who crushed Sherlock's self confidence regarding this. He's the one who made it so even the great Sherlock Holmes with all the evidence in front of him couldn't believe his own eyes.

"Of course I am." John takes a deep breath, then finishes, "I love you."

Sherlock starts blinking rapidly and gaping at him. John's seen this a couple times before. He privately refers to it as a 'reboot'. He knows if he waits a moment Sherlock will finish processing and continue the conversation.

It happens a bit faster then usual.

"You love me."

"Yes. Wholeheartedly."

"You love me."

"Yes."

"Why did you never tell me sooner?"

"Thought I might scare you or something. I didn't want to lose any of this. Of our lives. You."

Sherlock nods his head sagely.

"Now kiss!"

Both men are startled by the small voice from the doorway. John reacts first.

"Rosie! You startled us."

Rosie comes into the room. She takes Sherlock's hand and John's and puts them together. "When people say 'I love you' you have to kiss them."

John's face flushes, "Oh, well, uh-"

"John. You heard Rosie. You have to kiss me. It's the rules." Sherlock smiles at John one of his truly happy eye wrinkling smiles.

John looks at Sherlock in disbelief. When he came home this evening this absolutely not what he expected, but it's wonderful.

"Oh well, if it's the rules."

John leaned in towards Sherlock and Sherlock leaned towards him and they gave each other a solid kiss on the lips.

"About time!"

Both men again are startled by Rosie's outburst.

"Excuse me?" They say in unison.

For her part Rosie seems startled that she upset the adults.

"Rosie, why on earth would you say that?" John asks her gently.

"Mrs. Hudson said that if she ever saw you kissing she would yell 'about time'."

"Ah ok. Well sweetheart Mrs. Hudson is old and only old people are allowed to say that when Sherlock and I kiss. Little girls shouldn't say it."

Rosie puts on what John has begun determining her 'deductive face' because it looks so similar to the level of concentration Sherlock has on his when deducing.

She nods her head once, "Ok."

She then moves to the coffee table and begins playing with her dolls.

John smiles at Sherlock, "Want to know what I wished for for Christmas?"

Sherlock raises his brow, "What?"

"That we would always be together."

Sherlock's quiet a moment before looking at John with a small smile and narrowed eyes.

"Did you just propose to me?"

John grins from ear to ear. "I'm pretty sure I just did. What do you say? Forever and always?"

Sherlock gives a choked laugh and leans forward throwing his arms around John giving him a hug.

"Forever and always."

Date: 2018-12-07 05:40 pm (UTC)
tei: Rabbit from the Garden of Earthly Delights (Default)
From: [personal profile] tei
Oh my gosh, this was so sweet! I LOVE all of the little elements that definitely feel like one of those inscrutable-to-outsiders family traditions— like everyone saying “obviously” together. And Rosie absorbing from Mrs. Hudson what to say when they finally get together, yessssss. So cute!

Date: 2018-12-07 09:03 pm (UTC)
elwinglyre: (Default)
From: [personal profile] elwinglyre
What a sweet story!

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